What will be shall be

5 reasons why I should be paid 5 times my present salary

As I mentioned in my previous post, I have found a job as a sales assistant in one of the shopping mall in the west side. Having worked for a couple of days, I realized that my job doesn’t comprise of just serving my customers. In fact, I am working 5 jobs at the same time. Therefore, I ought to be paid 5 times my present salary.

I need to serve my customers. I have to look to their needs and bring their choices and sizes from the store and make sure that they are satisfied with their purchases. That was what I am getting paid for. That damned $4 an hour.

I am a fashion consultant as well. My customers always ask me whether the item which they have chosen is the most ‘in’ thing at the moment or not. They will also ask whether they looked nice or not in their new shirt or shoes they are going to buy. Somehow, I always managed to convince them that whatever they are buying is definitely the best and the newest at the moment. I only hoped that they don’t realize the spider webs on the shoe box though.

I am a baby-sitter too. Sometimes mothers doing their shopping will leave their kid with me and asked me to look after them while they shopped in peace. I always like to show these kids new things. Don’t worry I am no Michael Jackson. But these kids are always very fascinated about my ability to blow bubbles with my saliva. I always like to do that ever since I was a kid.

I am a counselor too. Once I had a Malay auntie saying she wanted to get shoes for her 14 years old son. We got started on a little conversation and she whined about how her son is so mischievous, always going home late..not studying…playing the guitar and etc and asked me whether there was any way to make her son behave. I recommended caging him and send him to the zoo and releasing him only when he has reached the age of 21.

I moonlighted as a model too. Some of the customers wanted to get shirts or shoes for somebody else. They would then remark that the person they are buying for is about my size. Then I had to stand still while they measured the shirt against me to see if I will fit. That is not all. They even made me try on shoes to see if I could wear them or not. I hope they will have nightmares on my uncut and unwashed toe nails.

I am really thinking of approaching my boss about increasing my salary 5-fold. I reckon the chances of him doing so is just about as high as Fiona Xie approaching me for my hand phone number. Meanwhile, I am just keeping my fingers crossed.

posted by malmoncolo @ 4:34 AM